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Letter "J" » Jay Leno Quotes
«Today is Valentine's Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day!»
«In just two weeks, Bill Clinton will no longer be President of the United States. He'll just be another chubby, middle-aged guy annoying the waitresses at Hooters.»
«This is a busy time for President Clinton. Not only does he have that thing in Kosovo, it's also prom season.»
«The White House began airing their TV commercials to re-elect the president, and the John Kerry campaign is condemning his use of 9/11 in the ads. He said it is unconscionable to use the tragic memory of a war in order to get elected unless, of course, it's the Vietnam War.»
«Al Gore has found a new job. He is going to teach journalism at Columbia University, which is ironic isn't it? The guy who did all the coke winds up going to the White House, the guy who didn't do coke goes to Columbia.»
«New Year's Eve, where auld acquaintance be forgot. Unless, of course, those tests come back positive»
Author: Jay Leno (Comedian, Host) | About: New Year | Keywords: acquaintance, auld, Eve, forgot, tests
«Saddam Hussein has invited members from the U.S. Congress to visit Iraq. Man how stupid is Hussein? If you think Bush had incentive to bomb Iraq before, imagine if Congress was over there.»
«John Kerry met with Al Sharpton. Can you see the two of them standing together? It'd look like Abe Lincoln with Ruben from American Idol.»
«Thanks for coming out on such a hot day. I was sweating like Saddam Hussein watching Bush's poll numbers drop.»
«President Clinton, this guy is sharp. Boy, he gave Hillary the most romantic Valentine's gift today, a huge rose garden. Where would he get that?»

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