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Letter "A" » Ambrose Bierce Quotes
«TWICE, adv. Once too often.»
Author: Ambrose Bierce (Editor, Journalist, Writer) | Keywords: adv
«UN-AMERICAN, adj. Wicked, intolerable, heathenish.»
«UNIVERSALIST, n. One who forgoes the advantage of a Hell for persons of another faith.»
«SORCERY, n. The ancient prototype and forerunner of political influence. It was, however, deemed less respectable and sometimes was punished by torture and death. Augustine Nicholas relates that a poor peasant who had been accused of sorcery was put to the torture to compel a confession. After enduring a few gentle agonies the suffering simpleton admitted his guilt, but naively asked his tormentors if it were not possible to be a sorcerer without knowing it.»
«UXORIOUSNESS, n. A perverted affection that has strayed to one's own wife.»
«VIRTUES, n.pl. Certain abstentions.»
«WEAKNESSES, n.pl. Certain primal powers of Tyrant Woman wherewith she holds dominion over the male of her species, binding him to the service of her will and paralyzing his rebellious energies.»
«SENATE, n. A body of elderly gentlemen charged with high duties and misdemeanors.»
«SIREN, n. One of several musical prodigies famous for a vain attempt to dissuade Odysseus from a life on the ocean wave. Figuratively, any lady of splendid promise, dissembled purpose and disappointing performance.»
«SYLPH, n. An immaterial but visible being that inhabited the air when the air was an element and before it was fatally polluted with factory smoke, sewer gas and similar products of civilization. Sylphs were allied to gnomes, nymphs and salamanders, which dwelt, respectively, in earth, water and fire, all now insalubrious. Sylphs, like fowls of the air, were male and female, to no purpose, apparently, for if they had progeny they must have nested in accessible places, none of the chicks having ever been seen.»

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